Being that I am just Some Other Dude with a whopping 90 followers on Twitter, most of whom are random Twitter accounts fishing for followers themselves; 2 followers of my college football blog, one of whom is me; and 2 likes on my SOD CFB Facebook page; with no access to anyone who has anything at all to do with FBS college football programs, the only kind of interviews I can do are one-sided. But, hey, I thought, why should I let the fact that my intended subject is not, and never will be, available to me stop me from asking the questions and letting you, the reader (yes, singular, maybe someday that can be plural) fantasize about his or her or its answer?
So, here in the first of many one-sided interviews, I am not joined by the Head Football Coach of the reigning National Champions, Ohio State Buckeyes, Urban Meyer.
SOD: First of all coach, thank you for not joining me and congratulations on your success last year and best of luck with preparing to defend your title in the upcoming season.
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: Coach, last year, of all the teams to make the inaugural FBS Playoffs, your Ohio State Buckeyes certainly had the most precarious route to the Final 4. In realistically looking back on last season, was there ever a time when you thought that, perhaps, the playoffs might not be in the cards for your team and when, if ever, did you get the sense that you guys were destined for this historic playoff?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: Thank you coach for such an honest and insightful answer. Now, as you prepare for this coming year, every analyst and prognosticator has already penciled the Buckeyes into the 2015 FBS playoffs and most of the talking heads suggest that your most challenging opponent this year is going to be the potential complacency of your own football squad. What, as a coach and coaching staff, if anything, do you do to battle this opponent week in and week out with such high expectations on your team?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: Very interesting. So, even before fall practices start, you have disciplined 4 high impact players on your team for violating team rules which includes being suspended from your opening game against a very tough Virginia Tech squad – the one team, by the way, that beat you last year and almost derailed your trip to the National Championship. Now, I understand and appreciate that this is an internal matter and you are not going to get into the details of this decision, but, is the behavior of these four football players in any way an indication of complacency already sticking its ugly head into your locker room?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: I understand. Now coach, you have had a very successful and very impressive first three years at Ohio State including a combined record of 38 wins and 3 losses and culminating, at this point, in the 2015 National Playoff Championship. But, your tenure at Ohio State started after a well-documented, somewhat surprising and somewhat controversial, early retirement from the ranks of Head Coaching for personal and health reasons. You have vowed to continue your coaching career with a bit more “balance” between your coaching and personal life, and, what I think our reader would like to know is, how is that working out for you? You are in the spotlight once again at a very prominent university with higher than life expectations year in and year out; are you maintaining that sought after balance? Do you have any fear of returning to that unhealthy place where you found yourself in Florida?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: I am glad to hear that coach. Now on to 2015. One of the reasons why Ohio State sits at the top of everyone’s pre-season polls is because you return so many of the players, on both sides of the football, that took you to the pinnacle last year; can you tell us about any of the fresh, new faces we might expect to see play a prominent role on your team this season?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: Thank you coach, and, to no one’s surprise, the QB position is not one of those where a new face will shine. You have been quoted as saying that Ohio State has “an embarrassment of riches” on their football team and that is certainly no truer than when it comes to the QB position; what are you in position to share with us about this position as you start your fall practices?
COACH MEYER: Not available for comment.
SOD: Well, coach, we thank you for not taking the time to join us today and allowing our reader to fantasize about how you might have answered all of our questions. We wish you and the Buckeyes the best of luck this year in defending your title and look forward to following your Buckeyes throughout the year.
So there you have it, our first one-sided interview of the 2015 College Football year. We look forward to conducting a number of these interviews throughout the year. Certainly it will be easy to schedule and conduct such interviews when we are not burdened with the problem of having the subject actually answer any of our questions. If you have any people or topics that you would like to see us cover in these interviews, please let us know.
And, who knows, when our viewership exceeds 2 people a day, maybe we can actually entice someone to be our first two-sided interview. Thanks for reading and … if you can’t spike the football, then spike the lemonade.